finale

so this is the final post on this blog. if you'd like to come over to the new digs, feel free to email me or leave a comment here. i'll be keeping tabs here for a while longer, but there will be nothing new posted. thanks for reading my rants, raves and overall vents. i hope to see you on the flip side of 2008 at the new place. - S

if you want to know

where the new digs will be, email me (see profile) or leave a comment where you can be reached. there is a reason why I'm asking that and that will be addressed soon.

gag me

Killjoy: "S, will you put fancy title next to R's name on the roster?" Me: "yes, I will put fancy title next to freaks-out-about-every-little-thing-that-doesn't-go-her-way R's name." gag me. R is retiring in less than a year anyway. why does it f-ing matter?! so that she can act all superior and throw around her fancy title?! I used to care, well, I admit it still bothers me that someone whose going to retire very soon should get promoted. nothing like a bit of friend nepotism here! all I can say is that while it still bugs me, should the shit hit the fan it will hit her square in the holier-than-thou face first. she can use that fancy title to clean herself off, then. I'm covering my ass big time and documenting all of the work I do, saving the job forms the reps give me and have set up a "cover my ass" email so that should anything come up - well, hopefully nothing will, but I hope to prepared in any case.

the ick

so I started this week off sounding like Ertha Kitt ("Diamonds are Forever", anyone?) and now I sound like a prebubesent boy whose voice is cracking. ohhh, how I love getting "the ick". and just in time for the holidays, too! how wonderful. I guess if sounding funny is all I have to deal with, I'm ok with it. I'm just holding out hope that K and J don't get it. K already has a cough but I think that may have come from daycare as some of the kiddos there have the exact same sounding thing. only today and monday and then I finally get my week long holiday! I've been waiting for this since last march and it's here! maybe I'll get to catch up on various projects that've been half-started for the past 6 months! hmmmm, a girl can dream...

we interrupt the migration in progress...

to say thank you to mr. john rosemond for this article: ********* this is exactly how I felt while at the famiy get together. when K had his meltdown and other family members gawked - this is the deragatory feeling that oooooozed from their stares. that he was acting up because he has some "disease" and should be medicated. no one said that out loud, but you could feel it in the air. it's nice to know that I'm not alone in realizing that this is just the stage K is in and he doesn't need to be medicated or any of that bullshit. I'm not demeaning any child that legitimately has problems, but medicating for the sake of medicating - well that's a load of shit! as for the line where the parents are supposed to "suffer the physical abuse" when their child hits them - oh.hell.no! no to the fucking no! oh, wait! I'm not supposed to say the word "no"! well guess what..................................... NO! NO! NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO! if K is acting up, or doing something dangerous to himself or another person, he will get told "NO!". he can throw a tantrum, I don't care. I'm the mom and therefore when I put my foot down - it's the damn law and little man better step to the line and cool his britches. I get so tired of people (DR's none the less) that say we're supposed to be our kids best friend and nurture them with cutesy sayings and let them get away with practically anything. My "job" (if you will) is to be K's parent, and if we get along great. if we bump heads and are heading in the opposite direction, it's my way that goes. no discussion. I'm a parent first, friend second. ************* ok, this post got away from me. anyway, I'm grateful to see this article in today's paper. I'm going to go check out the satire that mr. rosemond mentioned now.

pssst - REVISED

REVISED: the migration to a new place is in process. stay tuned for updates.

no worse for wear...albeit sleepy

so the family get-together yesterday wasn't terrible. wasn't great, but then again I wasn't setting my expectations very high. the nap times were off which led to a cranky little man K, but he did really well up until the last 20 minutes when he had his "i'm way to tired" meltdown. it consisted of loud crying, lower lip pouting and red face, but again it was to be expected and I didn't bat an eye at it. we did what we could and made it through. Other than that, K did awesome. he didn't mind the extra people, the extra noise, the 2 extra kids. yeah, he did well. regarding the 2 babies, K could've cared less. it was actually really funny! cousin C was sitting behind K for a bit and C squealed at him. K turned around to see where the noise was coming from and paid it no mind! I guess you had to be there. it was like K couldn't be bothered with a baby and wanted to play with his truck! I did notice that during his meltdown in my lap, that some of the other family members gawked at us. like they had never seen a toddler meltdown before. I did my best to ignore them and just keep speaking calmly to K to try and get him to calm down. on the drive home (which came swiftly as K was at his wits end) I thought about how people judge you by how your kids behave. I thought about how unfair it is. I could go into all, but it'd reveal my up-teen-million neurosis and I'm not ready to go there yet. I also realized that I did the same thing until we had K. now, if I see a meltdown happening I'm just grateful it's not my kid. anyway, it bothered me a bit by having them gawk at us. like K was some alien child. I have news for them, those 2 cute little babies who coo'd and they ahhh'd at all afternoon - they will have their day! what the gawkers failed to remember is that K is in the throes of toddlerhood. he's left the baby days way behind and is hell-bent on finding his independence and testing his boundaries. I'm also grateful that I only have to see these people once a year! On a lighter note, K LOVED great-grandma's organ! he caught a glimpse of it through a door way and went beserk! He could've played on it for hours! will post pictures soon.

spending $$$ on what matters

this weekend, santa makes a visit at work for a photo op w/the kiddies. next week, the powers that be at work will be having lunch catered in. why am I bitching? the company is, after all, spending money on it's employees. well, that is all fine and dandy. however, how much money do you suppose they will be spending should someone (or someone's kid/family member) fall and get hurt because they were too cheap (ie - negligent) to have the snow and multiple layers of thick ice cleared from the work parking lot? (insert extreme sarcasm here) it's a fucking genious tank here, let me tell you!

trains

grandpa's trains are not safe anymore!

just because

and...

we're back! now comes the fun part of installing updates and such. on the work front, I have an meeting tomorrow elsewhere. hopefully it turns out well.

PC grrrrrrrrr

so our home PC shot craps on saturday night. J, ingenious as he is, macgyvered an old laptop to work but that turned out to be just as moody as the PC. we went an got a new one and J worked on that most of yesterday. there may be a hard drive issue as we can't get the OS to load. whatever it is, I wish it'd make itself really fucking obvious so that we can fix it. anyway, could you be so kind as to send de love vibes to de computer.....please!!!

one week

in one week the extended family will be getting together at great grandma's home for christmas. last year there was only K, however this year there will be two more! Aunt C & Uncle D with O along with Cousin N, Cousin D and C. (Are there enough letters for you?! Geez...) now if you recall the last time the extended family visit occured, it was Thanksgiving last year. if you recall, this happened. please pay particular attention to #7. so, I wonder what's going to come up this year...? I know that I'll be excluded a bit because Aunt C and Cousin D are dealing with infants still and I'm well into toddlerhood. eeehhh, I say. I do so much better with K as a toddler than a baby so I welcome it. the burning question will be: is Cousin N's baby not crying? hmmmmmm? (can you feel the sarcasm dripping off of that question?!)

white-out

it’s snowing. a thin blanket has been draped over the roads, on top of cars, across people’s shoulders.......there is a quietness that holds hands with each snowflake. a terrible thing has happened, and while men and women search to understand, the snow falls... and falls... and falls... in the recess of my mind I’d like to think the snow offers comfort. brings us in close, like a mother with child, hushing our panicked breaths and rapidly beating hearts. in other places, I hope it serves as white-out. zero visibility of a senselessness act. much like rain washes away dirt and grime, let the snow “hide the sharp edges of reality.” I don’t want to remember the violence here and yet I can’t avoid it. it’s like a sock clinging to the cuffs of my pants with static electricity. no matter how much I shake, rattle and roll, the damn thing just won’t go away. “Remember, remember the 5th of my December” taunts me. I don’t want to look it in the eye and acknowledge it and yet, I must so that every hug, every kiss, every tuck into bed at night, every “I love you”…… they must be stronger and much, much…………so much more meaningful.

...........

my mind is stuttering it's thoughts out, making it hard to concentrate today. a mere 6.10 miles seperating me from ........... like I said, my thoughts are scattered.

the drive home

on my drive home, the radio stations were re-capping the events of this. various reporters were talking with witness after witness; harrowing tales that all seem to end with "we were just doing some shopping." I was already worked up by everything when I heard a reporter ask a witness: "is this the last thing you'd expect to happen here?" um....dumbshit reporter, what the fuck do you think?! (insert extreme sarcasm here) no, we all dream of having our days filled with running for our lives and dodging bullets while watching someone five feet away get shot! here's some advice for you, mr. reporter, don't EVER ASK THAT QUESTION AGAIN! that question only has one answer and it's pretty fucking OBVIOUS what that is: No one expects that to happen, EVER! (end sarcasm...for now) I was nowhere near this area, thankfully, but it's still way too close. this stuff doesn't happen here. I'm not saying that this area is crime free and perfect, but nothing has been taken to this extreme, ever. so here we are, coping. me by blogging and distracting myself with various internet searches of whatever, J by watching SuperBad and K asleep dreaming of chasing dogs and racing cars.

toes need food too!

K has been saying "biiiii-te" (bite) for some time now. it's his universal way of saying eat, drink (and be merry) to whomever and whatever. his latest thing is to say it while shoving his cup of milk / forkful of food in wubby dog's nose, my face or his own feet (which I can only dream of being so limber). K would having nothing of letting me get a picture of him "feeding" his toes, but I'm on a mission now. I mean, I do have to have something to show his first girlfriend, right?!

K vs. Daddy

so... what do 2 boys do when cooped up inside due to the weather?

it's a winter wonderland

ahhh, everything is aglow with a fresh coat of... I.C.E this means that wonderland requires figuring out how long it will take you to bite it and fall ass over end.