white-out

it’s snowing. a thin blanket has been draped over the roads, on top of cars, across people’s shoulders.......there is a quietness that holds hands with each snowflake. a terrible thing has happened, and while men and women search to understand, the snow falls... and falls... and falls... in the recess of my mind I’d like to think the snow offers comfort. brings us in close, like a mother with child, hushing our panicked breaths and rapidly beating hearts. in other places, I hope it serves as white-out. zero visibility of a senselessness act. much like rain washes away dirt and grime, let the snow “hide the sharp edges of reality.” I don’t want to remember the violence here and yet I can’t avoid it. it’s like a sock clinging to the cuffs of my pants with static electricity. no matter how much I shake, rattle and roll, the damn thing just won’t go away. “Remember, remember the 5th of my December” taunts me. I don’t want to look it in the eye and acknowledge it and yet, I must so that every hug, every kiss, every tuck into bed at night, every “I love you”…… they must be stronger and much, much…………so much more meaningful.